Sunday, November 21, 2010

5 days and my thoughts....

My mom took Janie with her to the grocery store this morning and I am sitting here thinking.....(not always a good thing-ha ha).

In 5 days my life will be forever changed (again). In 5 days I will get on a plane and follow God's lead to travel around the world. In 5 days I will try to explain to Janie why she is sitting on this big thing in the sky for so many hours.....

Then just a few days after that I will be handed my daughter! Janie will meet her sister! MiMi will snuggle her grandchild. I honestly have 2 ways I look at this journey:

1. The funny side of this journey:
  • I am about to be outnumbered! Yep, Janie is running (not walking anymore) and Lexie is crawling--I think they will keep me on my toes!
  • I will finally go on that diet and lose the weight I need to-chasing these 2 girls will be a workout! 
  • I think they will "plot" against me and plan to make my life very interesting.
  • Getting all 3 of us ready in the mornings--well, let's just say I can already see the chaos ahead
  • And much, much, more that I just shake my head thinking about....
2. The serious side of the journey:

God is smiling on us. I have tears in my eyes as I think about this. And I am left to wonder, what have I done to deserve this? You know, when things aren't going right, the non-faithful always question God with "What have I done to deserve this?" They question why God is "punishing" them.....Not me, today I am asking the Lord "What have I done to deserve this amazing blessing?" I am thanking HIM for this journey....wow! It pretty much leaves me speechless--which if you know me, you know is hard to do! 

When He brought Janie into my life I could not imagine how much He loved me. Janie is His child and He has chosen me to be her mommy--now, He has done the same with Lexie. I feel so honored to be the "chosen one" for these girls. I remember aching for Janie and wondering when God would show me my child. Now I know, He had me wait so that Janie and Lexie would be together. He knew them all along....only God could plan this. These precious girls must have special plans ahead--I cannot wait to be a part of this path. I can only imagine what is in their future. 

Some people go thier entire lives and never feel the blessing of one--now I have 2. I cannot be more grateful......

1 comment:

Shelly said...

So well said, Tonya. Only God, only God! My thoughts and prayers will be with you the entire way!